Open letter to Critical Shoppers

J. C. Penney has always trafficked in knockoffs that aren’t quite up to Canal Street’s illegal standards. It was never “get the look for less” so much as “get something vaguely shaped like the designer thing you want, but cut much more conservatively, made in all-petroleum materials, and with a too-similar wannabe logo that announces your inferiority to evil classmates as surely as if you were cursed to be followed around by a tuba section.”
Cintra Wilson, Critical Shopper: Playing to the Middle. NYTimes, 11 Aug 2009

This isn’t, may I remind you, The Daily Mail. It’s the New York Times, the alleged Paper of Record. Is this an attempt to be relevant? To draw on the snark of the blogosphere that the kids are supposedly so crazy about? Well, let me give you a little internet home-brew: FAIL. EPIC FAIL, even. I could add “compassion fail” and “humanity fail,” if I so chose. I’d say “journalism fail,” but if you keep this up, I won’t need to.
Times Writer Finds J.C. Penney’s Focus On Fat People Clever, Amusing. Jezebel Online Mag, 14 Aug 2009

Dear Clark Hoyt and Angry New York Times Readers,

People get ready

Dear Friends,

As many of us scatter to the wilderness and exotic locations (Socorro? Pullman?) I thought we might keep in touch here, at the center of the universe.  The topic of Book Club has come up several times, with many of us making bold claims to want to participate in such a organization. So, I am organizing! And, in my copious free hours, I have been thinking!

I need to consult with you on a few things, namely, how this club will meet, virtually, and without the usual bribes of food and booze. I imagine the virtual discussion could extend over several days, but it will be more fun if we all read the book at approximately the same time, don’t you think?  I also think it best if each book has a Discussion Leader (DL) who will be responsible for prodding the rest of the club into conversation. I leave the methods of peer pressure and leadership style to the individual DL. You may post a book review,  a letter to the author, chapter-by-chapter commentary, bullet-pointed discussion questions, reader’s poll, inspired or inspirational poetry, interpretive art, interpretive LOL[CAT]s, video reenactment,  or whatever you like. You may meet with fellow members in your geographic location for an in vivo mini-meeting (perhaps with food and booze- because gustatory enticements always work. I learned that in graduate school.) and write your post collaboratively. We love freedom here at the center of the universe. HOWEVER: we do need to determine how we will select books, and how often to “meet”. I have compiled some governmental categories to facilitate discussion.

Rotating dictatorship: DL’s choice, everyone gets a turn.

Rotating chairmanship: open nominations for books with selection by vote. Members pressed into service as DL on a rotating basis.

Representative democracy: anonymous nominations; selection by vote; nominator becomes DL.

Mob rule: any member may post a nomination and, through superior rhetoric, attempt to attract the commitment of other members. Participation non-mandatory.

Creative socialism: some combination of the above. Or other.

I’m leaning toward representative democracy with a side of mob rule. Discuss. Commentate.

Love, LL.